Friday, November 28, 2008

Bombay

The city is called "Bombay"

OK?

Good.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Cris Collinsworth

Cris - we get it. You're gay for McNabb.

There's no danger we could have missed that.

Monday, November 24, 2008

McNabb

Don't go to bat for Donovan McNabb. He's not bad, surely, but he's not the god of quarterbacking who is supposed to take the Eagles to the Super Bowl every year. In case you hadn't noticed, that hasn't been happening. If he hadn't been hyped up to Hall of Fame status, it might not be a big deal when he plays horribly, but Pennsylvania was sold a bill of goods on this guy. First, Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie threatened to move the team if PA taxpayers didn't agree to a sweetheart stadium deal for him. The Eagles also got rid of Jeff Garcia, a passable QB, in favor of the McNabb fetish. And the O-line and defense have seemingly been utterly neglected in a pathological focus on McNabb, McNabb, McNabb. What the Eagles are left with is the best back in the league (Brian Westbrook), who can't do a damn thing with an group of lineman reminiscent of the Maginot Line. Jim Johnson, the brilliant defensive coordinator, has been bleeding personnel because of the single-minded pursuit of McNabb targets on offense.

Basically, shut up. McNabb isn't the only problem, but he's a problem. Andy Reid is a problem. Jeffrey Lurie is a problem. And the Eagles are in the basement of the NFC East. Way to go, dudes.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Google - Not Bright

I bet you thought the Google people were smart.

I wonder if Google will want us to remember Tiananmen Square? Oh, right, they're shills for the Chinese tyrants who perpetrated that. Guess not!

Stay classy, Google.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

YEAHHHH

I am now licensed to carry firearms in the great Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

So it's a good day.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

For Every Green Thing You Do

...I'm burning an acre of rainforest.

Friday, November 07, 2008

State Action

Look, people, if you don't understand the state action requirement, that's fine.

But leave Con Law to those of us who do.

A bunch of private citizens refusing to agree with some other people is not a constitutional violation.

Cool?

Cool.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Written yesterday in contracts

Once in a while a man comes along
Snorting some coke and then hitting a bong;
But now he’s assuming the air of a gent,
Hey! Let’s make this scumbag our next president!

He’s “transcending race” not just being racist
If you disagree he’ll say “cease and desist.”
We don’t know a thing about his temperament
But who cares? We’ll let him be the president.

He threw his dear grandmother under the bus:
“She can’t help her racism – don’t make a fuss.”
But now she just died and his heart needs a splint
Our pity allows him to be president.

Foreigners will now respect us once more
For shoving that cowboy right out of the door;
But our enemies certainly get the hint
This weakling won’t stop them when he’s president.

He’s espousing policies of Karl Marx
Throwing both wealthy and poor to the sharks
But hey! Won’t he help pay my apartment rent?!
Fuck yeah! Let’s just let him be president.



(I have been reading too much A. E. Housman lately.)

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

In Bizarro World, Bait Race YOU!

If you say that Obama's victory is a victory for race relations, you are retarded.

Too many people are retarded.

Oy Rope Uh

Oh, thank goodness. Now Europe will stop hating us.

Hey, aren't they those guys who started a massive war where tens of millions of people were killed, and who rounded up Jews and executed them in cold blood?

Was that some other Europe, or what?

You can take your "respect" and cram it, duders.

He chose...poorly

Congress has the worst approval rating ever - let's have more of the same.

The President is an interventionist open-borders wastrel - let's replace him with someone even worse on all these points.

The world hates us - let's give them a real reason.

I guess democracy spoke!

Ayers/Wright 2012!

Zombie Mao/Farrakhan 2016!

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Owned

lol@business method patents

Monday, November 03, 2008

The Great Commonwealth

It's weird to have candidates invoking Ed Rendell's name in their commercials...

...only to point out that Fast Eddie is on their side.

"Vote for me! I have the same policy goals as a vote-suppressing corrupt piece of garbage!"

Why do people talk about this state as if it's in play? If the living citizens don't vote blue, you can be sure Mickey Mouse and a few million of his dead friends will.